It’s a BIG book—literally and literarily!

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Librarians, and people considering publishing a paper book, this one is for you!

When I began writing Ms. Creant a number of years ago, I found myself reaching for my reading glasses more and more often as I researched the book. The decision to purchase them was based on my rationalization that due to the ridiculous amount of safety warnings being printed on labels these days, the font sizes were being decreased so much that only a very few people could read them. It had nothing to do with being in my forties.

Denial.

As a single guy in this age group, you cling to your youth amidst a mostly unacknowledged mid-life crisis, which means you wage war on the gray hairs more and more frequently until it is just a part of your unconscious daily routine. You have to attempt to look younger than you actually are in order to have any shot with women still in their child-bearing years—or so you have convinced yourself. Part of maintaining a youthful appearance in public requires that we can read a book without the apparent need of reading glasses; something I can do easily with a twelve-point font size.

Light bulb.

I would produce a book that people over forty can read at the beach without glasses. As it turned out there are both upsides and downsides to this decision for a self-published author.

Big 8” x 10” large print books are expensive to produce.

It seems that by choosing this size—after literally measuring bookshelves in libraries and bookstores—Ms. Creant would fall into Ingram’s “custom” category; something outside of their standard size offerings. I would go on to make the executive decision to proceed with this ideally sized book regardless of the fact that my book would be about five bucks higher in price than so-called “competitive” books coming out of the mainstream traditional publishers. Here is how I rationalized it at the time:

  • I have read enough books in my genre to know I was producing an original work; ergo, I was PEERLESS, and as such did not have to worry about “competitors”.
  • Additionally, my book is a legitimate reference / textbook whose competition is priced in the stratosphere by comparison. Most of those authors have PHDs and have many titles. Does anyone really care?
  • Lastly, I have purchased many large books over the years, sometimes for as much as three times the price that would be assigned to Ms. Creant. I ASS-U-ME-D all book buyers were just like me, in that they buy books based on the VALUE of the content rather than PRICE. It’s the words that count, right?

Yeah . . . turns out I was WRONG about all that stuff.

Always one to look on the bright side, it turns out that libraries actually like big paperbacks vs. the more expensive hardcover option; especially when taking on a book from a relatively unknown first-time author.

So, I have that going for me.

BIG news!

As a thank you for their support and to embrace, however reluctantly, the new wave of e-book options available in libraries, I have dramatically reduced the price of Ms. Creant in all the specialty library e-book platforms available from Smashwords. What more could they want? Oh yeah, reviews.

I have those.

Excerpts from reviews:

“Although, there is plenty of scientific, medical, and technical references laced throughout to draw from, Mr. Barker has managed to write the perfect self-awareness, self-help, self-insight book in a manner that is entertaining, witty, intelligent and informative without being dry and judgmental.” “It isn’t often that I say an author has thoroughly done their research, but in E. A. Barker’s case I can.” “5 stars across the board for writing, research, execution, and editing; a rarity for this reviewer.”

5 STARS – Savannah Morgan – Amazon.com

 

“Well, damn, I loved it. A wonderfully-written foray into the male psyche and too rarely plumbed ‘she done him wrong’ kerfuffle.” “Penned with wisdom, humor and a keen insight into the battle of the sexes and exes, this book kept me laughing, frowning, and on more than one occasion, prompted introspection.” “Brilliant book!”

5 STARS – Shelby Kent-Stewart – Amazon.com

 

“I LOVED this book!!! I LOVED being able to get a sneak peek into the mind of men. This book was both funny and insightful!!” “…I am so glad that I picked it up!!!”

5 STARS – Ebony Arrington – McMillan – Amazon.com

 

“I wasn’t sure what exactly to expect from this book. What I got, was humor, insight, and some riveting stories about relationships, good and bad. Each story shone a beacon on flaws in character, strengths of character, and wit.” “I enjoyed meeting the people in the book.” “I gave it five stars because it is truly a manual that both men and women can sink their teeth into.” “Excellently written and surprisingly fun.”

5 STARS – Vicki Goodwin –  Amazon.com

 

“As a woman and a lesbian I was a little unsure about reading this book. Especially with it being from a man’s perspective.” “You will get a better understanding of the dynamics of relationships, of life and the do’s and don’ts. I highly recommend this book for everyone to read. You may learn things about yourself that you never knew before.” “Truly amazing read, you  won’t be sorry!”

5 STARS – Leah Negron –  Amazon.com

 

“ . . . it’s an original work in a sea of similitude.”

Patricia Annette – Massive Book Hog Blog

 

” . . . a fascinating fun read for both sexes.”

Eldon Taylor – Author and host of the Provocative Enlightenment radio show

 

“Yes – it is a great book. It certainly opens up dialog.”

Ravinder Taylor – Co-host on the Provocative Enlightenment radio show

 

“I am a woman in my middle sixties happily married for 45 years with children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren.” “This book should be read by men and women in their early stages of adulthood. The author was quite informative but had a good sense humor as well. Read this book with an open mind and I’m sure you will enjoy it as much as I did. Keep writing E. A. Barker, you are a very gifted author.”

5 STARS – Amazon.com customer

 

“Personally I think that everyone that has ever been in a relationship or will ever be in a relationship should read this book. It is insightful, funny at times and not for children.” “I would give this book a 5 star review out of 5 possible stars. This is one you don’t want to miss. Try something different you won’t be sorry.” “Amazing.”

5 STARS – Roadie Notes Book Blog – Becky Narron

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“As a woman who has spent a lot of time trying to figure out how men see these types of things, this book was a breath of fresh air! Humorous and informative, I will definitely be recommending this book to others!” “Absolutely loved it!”

5 STARS – Amazon.com customer

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“. . . Ms. Creant: The Wrong Doers! is far from boring, not my typical nonfiction read and not what I was expecting.” “I highly recommend this book for men and women, as well as young adults (teenagers).” “Bravo Mr. E. A. Barker!”

5 STARS – Denise – Amazon.ca

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“I approached this book with an open mind, and had to say that I thoroughly enjoyed it!” “I honestly can’t say if Ms. Creant will change the world, but it certainly altered my perception of it! Totally recommended – read this book, people!”

5 STARS – James Longmore – Amazon.com

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“Wow, I read this book relatively fast, and actually went back to read it again. There is so much information packed into the pages, it definitely warrants more than one read.” “I absolutely LOVE Barker’s writing voice.” “I highly recommend this book to everyone.” “5 Life Altering Stars”

5 STARS – Xtina Marie – Amazon.com & Goodreads

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“If you can read this with an open mind, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it as much as I did and gain some very useful knowledge. I have a 22 year old son, and I’ll be getting him a copy to read. I hope he heeds the advice given, because I believe he’ll be a better man because of it.” “A definite must read.”

5 STARS  – Ms. D. Breault – Amazon.com & Goodreads

 

To see the full reviews follow these links:

Amazon.com

Amazon.ca

Goodreads.com

 

Thanks for reading.

E. A.

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My New Year’s Resolution

Happy 2018 everyone.

It turns out my resolution for this year is just a rehash of the one I broke in 2017—to get the social media monkey off my back, a.k.a. use my time more productively. I refuse to be corralled by the so called social media book marketing experts any longer. They will tell you must somehow cultivate readers from followers on your many social media sites and you will have to invest a great deal of time or money to accomplish this.

NONSENSE!

If there is one thing I have learned after three long torturous years on anti-social media, it is:

FOLLOWERS DO NOT READERS MAKE.

I swear these experts are paid by the mainstream publishing industry to set indie and small press authors up to fail.

In the olden days, circa 1989, when we wanted to sell something, we would apply “old school” “grass roots” marketing techniques featuring outdated notions like targeting prospective customers and then getting off our asses to go visit them to forge a relationship. It always worked.

It would be wonderful if an author’s life could be dedicated to visiting libraries, bookstores, and book clubs full time, but the game just isn’t lucrative enough for 99.99% of us to do it.

Enter the internet. Yes, the same internet that connects you to facebook, twitter, snap chat and YouTube can also connect you to librarians, bloggers, and book clubs all over the world.

If you need me, I will be chatting somewhere else online in 2018, probably with a librarian, teacher, concerned parents group, or a book club administrator.

Speaking of librarians, did you know my website has a page just for them?

For Librarians

Ms. Creant: The Wrong Doers!

Life With Women: The Long-Awaited Instruction Manual

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A reader need only have an open mind to enjoy Ms. Creant.

Readers also possessing a sense of humor, will love it.

Blurb:

This book was created for everyone from young adults to seniors. It was written from a male’s point of view, speaking to men who are endlessly struggling to understand the opposite sex. For women, this is a fascinating journey inside the male psyche. The book gives a young reader a glimpse of the future, with a recommended timeline for key life events. Mature readers, who have already experienced much of what is discussed in the book, should come away with a new found understanding, and perhaps even closure. Ms. Creant is a controversial, entertaining, yet informative look at everything which influences human behaviour including: relationships, life, health, biology, philosophy, sociology, theology, politics, genetics—even physics. E. A. Barker shares twenty-four “inappropriate” stories of life with women. The author based these stories of women behaving badly on his real life experiences, spanning four decades of his search for an ideal partner. The lessons taken away from the book will serve to help readers make better choices, become more aware, grow and change—at any stage of life.

About the intended reader and a caution:

Ms. Creant was written by a man, from a man’s perspective, for men, and those soon to become men. Yes, many women have embraced the book as well, but it is doubtful any young female teenagers are likely to be handed a copy. It is difficult to state the exact age a young man should begin to explore the realities which lay ahead for him, so my first thought was to say age thirteen—the sooner the better. HOWEVER, I recommend we err on the side of caution. The book contains adult situations and sarcasm that the youngest readers may not comprehend without adult guidance to give them some clarification. This could cause an important message to be lost on them, or worse, they may embrace the poor behaviors illustrated. There are both young men and boys in the age range between thirteen and fifteen with significant variations in maturity levels found throughout the group. We can safely state that a young man is ready for Ms. Creant when he has experienced any of the following life events:

  • He has a poor attitude towards school.
  • He has been rejected by a girl.
  • He has a girlfriend.
  • He has had his first sexual encounter.
  • He has had his first heartbreak.
  • He has been caught with alcohol or drugs.

The important messages contained in Ms. Creant:

  • WHO you become is more important than WHAT you become.
  • Make smart choices.
  • Be aware of yourself and your possible futures.
  • You must always have a plan.
  • Stay in school.
  • Say no to drugs.
  • Practice safe sex.
  • How to recognize and keep you and your friends away from a date rape scenario.
  • Never stop working on self-improvement.
  • Completing a post-secondary education is a must.
  • There will be time for serious relationships once you have completed your education.
  • Chase your dream.
  • Choose to be happy.
  • See things as they are—not as you would like them to be.
  • Learn to recognize your own behavioral patterns.
  • We must rethink how we are raising our daughters.
  • The difference between sex and love.
  • Equality is achievable when we stop trying to manipulate each other.
  • Settle wisely.
  • Balance and communication are the key elements of a successful relationship.
  • Behaviors to avoid if you want to remain faithful.
  • How to survive the end of a serious relationship.
  • Understand menopause—it happens to all humans.
  • You can change anything and at any age.
  • To be completely healthy is to supply nutrition to all four parts of your being.
  • If you are pragmatic and grateful, death need not be scary.
  • Unbiased moral teachings might save humanity.
  • Parents must teach what the schools are not.
  • All sociological problems are directly linked to literacy.
  • Fear spreads quickly when rational thought is not present.
  • Political correctness is undermining freedom of speech—the communication of ideas—retarding humanity’s growth.
  • Working to become the best person you can be will make you a role model—an influencer—for others yet to come.

Ms. Creant is a relatively light look at the human condition.

Why was Ms. Creant written?

This was my attempt to change a world which becomes more distressing with each passing day.

By writing about many of the most difficult issues facing mankind with a pinch of humor, it was my hope that a conversation would be started which could spread awareness.

  • Men need a better understanding of both themselves and women.
  • Women need a better understanding of both themselves and men.
  • Both sexes need to see the world for what it is if we are to create change.
  • Continuing to live obliviously in a dream or a bubble made tolerable by escapism will not adequately prepare your children and grandchildren for the challenges they will face as these last two generations attempt to save humanity.
  • We cannot allow the goal of true equality to be corrupted by political correctness or reverse discrimination.
  • The patriarchy that has been with us for the past 5,000 years must be left behind.

Our present educational systems encourage ACCEPTANCE of what is thought to be known rather than the exploration of the subject matter which could bring about a paradigm shift.

The most fundamental teachings of philosophy—learning WHO we should strive to become—is no longer valued. Morality, ethics, and scruples are now increasingly rare traits found in the people we meet.

Most societies in the West have CONFORMED to the destructive and soon to be fatal ideology of economics based thinking. By placing a higher value on the words uttered by celebrities, the wealthy, religious zealots, and sports heroes than we do the words of the most brilliant minds, we are accelerating the fall of Western civilization.

We are teaching a watered down version of history, INFLUENCED by political and religious agendas, which focuses our attention on names, dates and places, instead of the more important causes and effects which led to wars and the fall of various civilizations throughout recorded time.

There are four interconnected elements which can adversely affect the health of a human being, but most people are not AWARE of them, nor do they know how to take care of each one.

Our educational systems pump out DAMAGED kids. In North America at least, human behavioral studies could help students to begin to understand themselves and others while simultaneously introducing them to a number of the sciences. An introduction to psychology, biology, genetics, anthropology and sociology could give children some PERSPECTIVE to assist them in surviving their K-12 education. Except in the most progressive schools, these studies are all but ignored until it is too late. Most of the emotional damage is done years before they reach college. Teaching young adults about human behavior when the student already has a fully developed identity is like closing the barn doors after the horses ran away.

Higher education has its problems too. The lesson most learned in universities is that degrees can be bought by those whose influential families are alumni or financial contributers. Money and power should not be held up as something for young people to strive for or envy. Corruption within the most important institutions in the world must end.

The grant system INFLUENCES academia. The saddest proof of this is in the statement: ‘ We are paid to search for answers—NOT TO FIND THEM.‘  Specialization within a general field of study has created division amongst scholars and furthered compartmentalization or outright suppression of findings. Until researchers stop being held back by doctrine within the peer review system, hard scientific evidence will continue to appear to the public as being subject to interpretation.

Serious subject matter handled in a not too serious way.

MsCreant.EABarker.com

 

Holiday Book Gift Guide

Season’s Greetings!

Do you have readers on your gift list?

Cyn Harris has produced a lovely Holiday Book Gift Guide to help you easily make a good book selection for all the readers you care about.

You will find one of my author friends in it. Diane Mae Robinson is a respected children’s author (Page 9.), and you can find me in there too! (Page 35.)

My present fron Kat

Don’t delay! Order from your favorite book retailer before December 15.

It often takes TWO WEEKS this time of year to receive the books you have ordered.

Check This Out!

My latest interview is up on Renee’s Author Spotlight.

We talk about my book, writing, and this crazy business.

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You can get a free copy of Renee’s dark fantasy book: Shadow Stalker just by clicking on the link.

It’s a good day.

Banned Books! Let’s see if this post will get banned.

WARNING!

THIS POST CONTAINS PROFANITY WHICH HOPEFULLY OFFENDS SOME LOSERS!

 

It’s really about WHO is doing the banning.

In the land of Auth, we spend too much of our time on social media instead of writing or editing which would better serve our readers. That being said, every once in a while something truly interesting blows up in our news-feeds and this is my take on the latest of those.

K Webster’s: The Wild has made a big noise of late because (if I have my third party facts straight) Amazon and now apparently Smashwords have refused to sell her latest book due its content. It should be noted, I do not read most of the genres that my social media “friends” write in. My information has come from a couple of blogger friends whose opinions I trust, even though I challenge those opinions when they get too far from center.

Here is what I have found out about Ms.  Webster:

  • She is an above average writer who, apparently, is a very nice person.
  • She writes “romance” a.k.a. “mommy porn”.
  • Her facebook author page actually says she writes “reckless romance”.

I think it is this recklessness that created the shit storm which neither she nor her book rightly deserve.

On the upside, “There is no such thing as bad publicity.”

So WHY did this seemingly nice lady do this?

The 99.97% of humans who have never written a book, and who never will, cannot possibly understand what it feels like to complete a work which has taken months or even years to finish. We are absolutely elated. I can best describe it as the feeling you have after great sex, only it is your brain that had the orgasm and not your body. The afterglow lasts for weeks instead of minutes and I swear it is a hormonal response, but I have zero supporting science to back this theory up. Our brain had a baby and our hormones are all messed up.

Postpartum Elation excuses aside, (I own this. © 2017 :D) Ms. Webster made some mistakes:

  • She either did not use alpha-readers in her process; or she chose unqualified fans as alphas; or she ignored warnings that should have come from them about the “taboo” aspects of the book.
  • Her editor, if she used one, should have reeled her in, just as mine did when I thought  it was okay to publish thirty pages of explicit sexual content in my non-fiction book.
  • Her proofreader, or betas reading the galley, should have questioned the content and pushed for the use of a crystal clear reader advisory.

If she left all of the above out of her process, then she learned her lesson the hard way.

Good writing is an intellectual exercise. Great writing adds in an emotional investment component from the writer to the intellectual exercise.

  • Great writers go off the rails while writing passionately, and this is why the publishing world employs editors.
  • Great writers want to push beyond the boundaries of their previous books, and again, this is why the publishing world employs editors.

It is entirely possible that K Webster is a great writer who, at the same time, is also an irresponsible publisher.

This brings us to my opinion of what I have seen on social media:

  1. K Webster can write whatever the fuck she wants, and I will defend her right to do so with my fucking life, if need be.
  2. Book publishers, distributors, and retailers can carry whatever the fuck they want, and I will defend their right to CHOOSE with my fucking life, if need be.
  3. Writing about a “taboo” subject is not an endorsement of that behavior, nor does it imply that the author engages in said activities—you fucking piece of shit book burners.
  4. REAL STATISTICAL STUDIES SHOW that abnormal behavior is not caused by reading. It is far more likely to occur in those who do not read and who have a history of abuse themselves, Get your fucking head out of your fucking ass and LEARN before you voice a fucking opinion.
  5. Publishers and self-publishers like K, have a responsibility to inform prospective readers about ANY content which depict characters engaged in activities “outside of societal norms” or which could trigger a negative psychological event in a PTSD sufferer. If we do not regulate ourselves, you can bet your asses we will have moronic government fucks thrust this upon us, and they will go straight for our covers.

My PG13 (ish) book has the following on the website:

About the intended reader and a caution:

Ms. Creant was written by a man, from a man’s perspective, for men, and those soon to become men. Yes, many women have embraced the book as well, but it is doubtful any young female teenagers are likely to be handed a copy. It is difficult to state the exact age a young man should begin to explore the realities which lay ahead for him, so my first thought was to say age thirteen—the sooner the better. HOWEVER, I recommend we err on the side of caution. The book contains adult situations and sarcasm that the youngest readers may not comprehend without adult guidance to give them some clarification. This could cause an important message to be lost on them, or worse, they may embrace the poor behaviors illustrated. There are both young men and boys in the age range between thirteen and fifteen with significant variations in maturity levels found throughout the group. We can safely state that a young man is ready for Ms. Creant when he has experienced any of the following life events:

  • He has a poor attitude towards school.
  • He has been rejected by a girl.
  • He has a girlfriend.
  • He has had his first sexual encounter.
  • He has had his first heartbreak.
  • He has been caught with alcohol or drugs.

Reality check:

  • Amazon and Smashwords CHOSE not to sell her book. This is a risk every writer takes when they venture too far from what society deems to be acceptable behavior.
  • To see some of America’s REAL banned books, visit: The Week for an article by Lauren Hansen and Theunis Bates. This is truly disturbing.
  • Censorship is not a giant corporate entity doing what they feel is best for their business.
  • No one is telling her she cannot sell her book. They are merely saying they will not sell it.
  • No storm troopers came to her door to confiscate her books.
  • Did she cause outrage? You bet.
  • Will she benefit from all this negative publicity? Probably, if she sells copies from her own website or out of the trunk of her car.
  • Was this a staged publicity event? From what I hear, she doesn’t seem the type.